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ENG 351 - Tigers are Predators, Humans are Prey (v 2.0)
This is a substantial revision of my story Tigers are Predators, Humans are Prey, which I wrote for my English 351 class last quarter. For our final portfolio, we were required to make a major revision to one of our stories, and I re-wrote "Tigers" completely from the Tiger's P.O.V. I think the story is definitely improved. I meant to post this revision to LJ earlier, but just didn't get around to doing it until now.
Kevyn ‘Hagrid’ Jacobs
Intro to Fiction Writing -- Instructor: Nick Dybek
2008.03.17
Tigers are Predators, Humans are Prey
“WE RULE THE PLANET!”
The challenge reverberated across the dry moat, echoing off the sculpted concrete walls that wrapped around the tiger enclosure.
Olga turned her head to see where the disturbing noise was coming from. She focused her keen amber eyes on a primate standing on the other side of the moat. A young male, by the looks of it. She studied the monkey boy, which was making loud noises in her direction.
The primate was staring right at the Siberian tiger. Olga stared back, captivated by the primate’s attempt to be noticed. It waved its arms above its head. “Yeah, that’s right! You heard me!” it shouted. “We’re the boss of you!”
Boris and Nicolai, Olga’s male companions, were ignoring the primate. They always ignored the annoying zoo visitors who shouted from the other side of the moat, preferring to nap lazily on the bare dirt floor of their prison.
Olga was not so complacent. She was endlessly fascinated by the primates over there on the other side of the moat. She frequently watched their meaty primate bodies as they thronged past the tiger enclosure. They came in all sorts of fascinating shapes and sizes: big ones, little ones, fat ones, skinny ones, pale ones, dark ones. Olga imagined what it would be like to eat one of them, to devour hot flesh instead of the pre-killed meat the keepers gave them.
And this primate was closer than normal.
It must have climbed the fence that kept the primates safely out of the reach of hungry tigers. It was standing calf-deep in the low hedge that ran along the lip of the moat, just inside the fence. Behind it, still outside the fence, were two other primates. Their eyes were wide as they watched what the first primate was doing.
The primate reached into its pocket, and pulled out something. It beamed it straight across the moat at the tigress. It missed, the pebble falling short of her side of the moat, clattering to the cement floor below.
“You know why you’re over there, trapped and why we’re over here, free, right?” the primate shouted at her. “Why is that? Because we’re at the top of the food chain!”
With that, it flung another rock at her, hitting her squarely in the rump. Olga flinched.
“Yeeeeeeah!” exclaimed the primate, dancing excitedly on its side of the moat. “Did ya see that, boys?” it shouted back over its shoulder to its audience. “I hit the tiger!”
Olga certainly wasn’t going to take this pelting lying down. She stood up and stretched her body and claws and jaws languidly, just like any other cat getting up from a nap. Then she padded over to her edge of the moat, and stood there, staring intently at the primate that was throwing rocks.
“Oooooooh! Look! Kitty’s not happy!” shouted the primate. It threw another pebble. “What are ya gonna do about it, huh? Not a damn thing you can do from over there!” Behind it, the other primates seemed to be getting agitated, and were motioning to get it to come back on their side of the fence.
Olga paced the edge of the moat briefly, never taking her eyes off the primate. Fixated on it, she suddenly bounded down into the moat. The primate fired off a couple more missiles at her, but missed as she prowled across the bottom of the concrete trench towards it. When she reached the base of the wall, she was directly below the primate, staring unblinking up into its monkey eyes. Her tail twitched.
“Yeah, I can see her,” the primate said over its shoulder to its companions. It looked back into her predator’s eyes. “She’s right down here looking at me! But there’s still not a damn thing she can do! Kitty’s stalking me – isn’t it cute?” With that, it let loose with another pebble, which popped Olga right between the eyes. The tiger winced.
“Hah! Take that, Be-otch!”
Olga continued to stare up at it, at the top of the moat wall. For three years now, she had calmly watched the parade of noisy primate visitors that came to look at the tiger habitat. For three years, she wondered if those primates would be good to eat. But until today, they had never gotten so close.
Sometimes the primate people would throw things at the tigers to try to get their attention. Trash, pine cones, little metal discs. Rarely did the impromptu projectiles make it across the moat. It was even rarer for one to hit the resting tigers.
But this one had hit her several times now, and was intent on shouting at her, gesticulating at her, trying to get her attention. Well, it had it. And it was inside the fence and past the hedge. She was close enough to smell it now, its primate scent wafting down from its perch on the top of the wall.
“Awwwww, poor kitty, whatsamattuh?” taunted the primate, letting loose with another pebble. “Wanna take me out, but ya can’t jump this high? Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.”
Thwack. Another stone landed squarely between Olga’s eyes. She flinched again, her tail twitching even more rapidly. She flattened herself against the floor of the moat, tensing her hindquarters.
“Yeeeeeee-hah!” exclaimed the primate. “Did you hear that?” it called back over its shoulder, to the primates still behind the fence, which Olga could no longer see. Not that she would have cared if she could – her entire focus was on her tormentor.
“What are they going to do to us, arrest us?” it called back over his shoulder to its companions. “Worst they’ll do is kick us out and call our parents. Big deal. I’m having fun. Watch this!”
The primate knelt down on the lip of the moat, balanced on one knee, and stuck its other leg out into the moat, directly above Olga. It shook it back and forth, tauntingly.
“Ha ha! Can’t get me, tuna-breath!” it crowed.
Just as it did, Olga made her move.
Like a released spring uncoiling, she jumped. Higher than she had ever jumped in her life. Straight up the side of the wall. She propelled herself more than half the distance, before digging her extended claws into the rough and cracked concrete walls like climber’s pitons. Going on a combination of momentum and determination, she clawed and struggled for purchase in the aging cement of the wall, breaking a couple of claws in the process. In a flash, she had scaled the entire height, and was scrambling over the lip and smack into the shocked primate who still hadn’t registered what had just happened. Stunned, it fell back into the hedge.
Olga pounced, grabbing the primate by the arm and back with her claws, and sinking her teeth deep into the flesh of its neck. Hot blood began to fill her mouth, and the sensation exhilarated her as no pre-killed meat could.
The primate barely had time to squeak, stunned as it was, before its vocal cords were crushed. Somewhere, deep down in the most primitive part of its mammalian brain, the message finally got through that should have been ringing alarm bells several minutes before: “Danger! Predator! Danger! Flee! Danger!”
But by then, it was too late. The primate struggled vainly for a few moments, blood pouring out of it as Olga ripped huge gashes in its side and back with her claws. Moments later, it stopped moving.
The kill made, Olga finally noticed the screaming. Looking up from her meal, her muzzle drenched in blood, she saw the crowd of primates on the other side of the fence scrambling over each other in a mad rush to get away from her. Their shrill screaming hurt her ears, and Olga decided to take the carcass back to her side of the moat, to dine in a more tranquil setting. Maybe she’d even share her kill with those two lazy males, Boris and Nicolai, who still weren’t paying attention. But only after she had her fill.
Olga grabbed the primate’s head in her powerful jaws, and jumped back down into the moat, dragging the limp body with her. Down to where she could eat in peace.
And oh my, yes, these primates are tasty!
Kevyn ‘Hagrid’ Jacobs
Intro to Fiction Writing -- Instructor: Nick Dybek
2008.03.17
“WE RULE THE PLANET!”
The challenge reverberated across the dry moat, echoing off the sculpted concrete walls that wrapped around the tiger enclosure.
Olga turned her head to see where the disturbing noise was coming from. She focused her keen amber eyes on a primate standing on the other side of the moat. A young male, by the looks of it. She studied the monkey boy, which was making loud noises in her direction.
The primate was staring right at the Siberian tiger. Olga stared back, captivated by the primate’s attempt to be noticed. It waved its arms above its head. “Yeah, that’s right! You heard me!” it shouted. “We’re the boss of you!”
Boris and Nicolai, Olga’s male companions, were ignoring the primate. They always ignored the annoying zoo visitors who shouted from the other side of the moat, preferring to nap lazily on the bare dirt floor of their prison.
Olga was not so complacent. She was endlessly fascinated by the primates over there on the other side of the moat. She frequently watched their meaty primate bodies as they thronged past the tiger enclosure. They came in all sorts of fascinating shapes and sizes: big ones, little ones, fat ones, skinny ones, pale ones, dark ones. Olga imagined what it would be like to eat one of them, to devour hot flesh instead of the pre-killed meat the keepers gave them.
And this primate was closer than normal.
It must have climbed the fence that kept the primates safely out of the reach of hungry tigers. It was standing calf-deep in the low hedge that ran along the lip of the moat, just inside the fence. Behind it, still outside the fence, were two other primates. Their eyes were wide as they watched what the first primate was doing.
The primate reached into its pocket, and pulled out something. It beamed it straight across the moat at the tigress. It missed, the pebble falling short of her side of the moat, clattering to the cement floor below.
“You know why you’re over there, trapped and why we’re over here, free, right?” the primate shouted at her. “Why is that? Because we’re at the top of the food chain!”
With that, it flung another rock at her, hitting her squarely in the rump. Olga flinched.
“Yeeeeeeah!” exclaimed the primate, dancing excitedly on its side of the moat. “Did ya see that, boys?” it shouted back over its shoulder to its audience. “I hit the tiger!”
Olga certainly wasn’t going to take this pelting lying down. She stood up and stretched her body and claws and jaws languidly, just like any other cat getting up from a nap. Then she padded over to her edge of the moat, and stood there, staring intently at the primate that was throwing rocks.
“Oooooooh! Look! Kitty’s not happy!” shouted the primate. It threw another pebble. “What are ya gonna do about it, huh? Not a damn thing you can do from over there!” Behind it, the other primates seemed to be getting agitated, and were motioning to get it to come back on their side of the fence.
Olga paced the edge of the moat briefly, never taking her eyes off the primate. Fixated on it, she suddenly bounded down into the moat. The primate fired off a couple more missiles at her, but missed as she prowled across the bottom of the concrete trench towards it. When she reached the base of the wall, she was directly below the primate, staring unblinking up into its monkey eyes. Her tail twitched.
“Yeah, I can see her,” the primate said over its shoulder to its companions. It looked back into her predator’s eyes. “She’s right down here looking at me! But there’s still not a damn thing she can do! Kitty’s stalking me – isn’t it cute?” With that, it let loose with another pebble, which popped Olga right between the eyes. The tiger winced.
“Hah! Take that, Be-otch!”
Olga continued to stare up at it, at the top of the moat wall. For three years now, she had calmly watched the parade of noisy primate visitors that came to look at the tiger habitat. For three years, she wondered if those primates would be good to eat. But until today, they had never gotten so close.
Sometimes the primate people would throw things at the tigers to try to get their attention. Trash, pine cones, little metal discs. Rarely did the impromptu projectiles make it across the moat. It was even rarer for one to hit the resting tigers.
But this one had hit her several times now, and was intent on shouting at her, gesticulating at her, trying to get her attention. Well, it had it. And it was inside the fence and past the hedge. She was close enough to smell it now, its primate scent wafting down from its perch on the top of the wall.
“Awwwww, poor kitty, whatsamattuh?” taunted the primate, letting loose with another pebble. “Wanna take me out, but ya can’t jump this high? Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.”
Thwack. Another stone landed squarely between Olga’s eyes. She flinched again, her tail twitching even more rapidly. She flattened herself against the floor of the moat, tensing her hindquarters.
“Yeeeeeee-hah!” exclaimed the primate. “Did you hear that?” it called back over its shoulder, to the primates still behind the fence, which Olga could no longer see. Not that she would have cared if she could – her entire focus was on her tormentor.
“What are they going to do to us, arrest us?” it called back over his shoulder to its companions. “Worst they’ll do is kick us out and call our parents. Big deal. I’m having fun. Watch this!”
The primate knelt down on the lip of the moat, balanced on one knee, and stuck its other leg out into the moat, directly above Olga. It shook it back and forth, tauntingly.
“Ha ha! Can’t get me, tuna-breath!” it crowed.
Just as it did, Olga made her move.
Like a released spring uncoiling, she jumped. Higher than she had ever jumped in her life. Straight up the side of the wall. She propelled herself more than half the distance, before digging her extended claws into the rough and cracked concrete walls like climber’s pitons. Going on a combination of momentum and determination, she clawed and struggled for purchase in the aging cement of the wall, breaking a couple of claws in the process. In a flash, she had scaled the entire height, and was scrambling over the lip and smack into the shocked primate who still hadn’t registered what had just happened. Stunned, it fell back into the hedge.
Olga pounced, grabbing the primate by the arm and back with her claws, and sinking her teeth deep into the flesh of its neck. Hot blood began to fill her mouth, and the sensation exhilarated her as no pre-killed meat could.
The primate barely had time to squeak, stunned as it was, before its vocal cords were crushed. Somewhere, deep down in the most primitive part of its mammalian brain, the message finally got through that should have been ringing alarm bells several minutes before: “Danger! Predator! Danger! Flee! Danger!”
But by then, it was too late. The primate struggled vainly for a few moments, blood pouring out of it as Olga ripped huge gashes in its side and back with her claws. Moments later, it stopped moving.
The kill made, Olga finally noticed the screaming. Looking up from her meal, her muzzle drenched in blood, she saw the crowd of primates on the other side of the fence scrambling over each other in a mad rush to get away from her. Their shrill screaming hurt her ears, and Olga decided to take the carcass back to her side of the moat, to dine in a more tranquil setting. Maybe she’d even share her kill with those two lazy males, Boris and Nicolai, who still weren’t paying attention. But only after she had her fill.
Olga grabbed the primate’s head in her powerful jaws, and jumped back down into the moat, dragging the limp body with her. Down to where she could eat in peace.
And oh my, yes, these primates are tasty!
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Now that the class is over, I am less afraid of writing fiction than I have been in the past.